The Rise of The Planet of The Social Media Apes

 We are all familiar with the Planet of The Apes storyline yes? How the apes evolve, take over the planet, enslave man and, as we saw in the first 5 movies, they lived a very technologically free existence. Now comes the new updated movie “Rise of the Planet of the Apes” and my question becomes; since we have changed so much since the original Ape films, will they “evolve” with our times?

I would seriously donate 3 years of my life to someone else’s needy body to see the Apes running about with iPhones, on Facebook and Twitter and operating Customer Service centers!

Can you see the Twitter Chat stream on TweetDeck after the rise of the Apes?

#UsCustServApes

@Gen_Urko Hey Doc,  I flipped U that missing link to post on talking humans. Get it? Missing link? LMAO

@CorneliusPHD  LOL Yeah,”missing link” I get it. Missed your calling. TTYL

@TaylorTalk Link this U DAMN DIRTY APES! http://bit.ly/rbOWDE

@ZiraHotDoc TROLL Alert. Just ignore him. He’ll *poof* They are just so damn ugly…

Now, we could make jokes until the Apes really take over about how a monkey could work a customer service call center as long as they have a script but how will the Apes truly be at excellent customer service?

“Thank you for calling. Zippo’s Shoes. Your call is important to us. Please stay on the line for the next representative”

1 minute later…

“Hello this is Natalie. How may I help you today?”

“Hello Natalie, my name is Caesar and I just ordered some new military boots for my Gorilla warfare army and unfortunately we got some in human design. Didn’t even know they made those anymore!”

“I am sorry for that Mr. Caesar. We will get those Simian cut boots out to you right away. Feel free to keep them and give them to your enslaved humans if you so wish.”

OK, will this all happen? No probably not. We have done a pretty good job seeing to the destruction of our cousin Ape's natural environment and slow extinction to guarantee that an Ape revolution would last the length of a David Hasselhoff Greatest Hits CD.

But, if it does happen? I’ll be the first human to sign up for Googlrilla Plus or HairyFacebook.com. I don’t monkey around when it comes to this stuff…

Of Superman and Authentic Customer Service on Twitter

The staple of the superhero mythology is, there’s the superhero and there is the alter ego. Batman in reality is Bruce Wayne, Green Lantern is Hal Jordan, Spider-Man is really Peter Parker. When that character wakes up every morning, he’s Peter Parker. He has to put on a costume to become Spider-Man.

And it is in that attribute that Superman stands alone. Superman didn’t become Superman. Superman was born Superman (Kal-El to the true geeks reading this). When Superman wakes up in the morning, has his coffee and showers he’s still Superman. His alter ego, his costume, is Clark Kent.

If you are one of the many companies that is dipping your toe into the Social Media stream to see if it’s something you want to utilize as a customer service outlet then listen closely true believers; If you do take this heroic path make sure you build a Justice League style support team! Whoever your voice is, especially if you utilize Twitter, make sure they are a Superman at customer service. What do I mean by SUPERMAN? Funny you should ask:

Simply

Using

Personal

Engagement

Really

Makes

A

Negative Into a Positive!

By having someone at the helm of your guest relations social media who is authentic and doesn’t don a “costume” to fulfill a role, makes the greatest difference in the world! People can smell a scripted person who is just going through the motions and “sounding” polite while on the other end they are reading the horoscopes and eyeing the clock.

Especially on Twitter! If you are making the effort and investment to use Twitter as a customer service outlet to achieve real-time results,  then you have to make sure that person has a “voice” that is going to be engaging, authentic and personable.  If you are going to go through all this trouble to build a customer response presence in social media then make sure you are dedicating real heroes to upholding your companies truth, justice and philosophies way.

Ted Coine just wrote a great piece on his “21^st century Leaders” blog about automated messages and what an impersonal thing they are in a world called “SOCIAL” media. The same, if not more importantly, must be said of, real-time customer service social media engagement.  If you hit them with a “you matter to us” auto response message when they Tweet your business, guess what? They will RT (re-tweet) what a villainous maneuver you just pulled and the Breck Effect takes place. They tell two friends, and so on, and so on… 

As I tell my customer service trainees/trainers for phone and online support at seminars, you MUST smile as you would if you were face to face with the guest. Believe me; they can “hear” it! A smile is not just a facial expression; it’s a tone of voice.

How your representatives “sound” can quell an irate customer just by “snake charming” them with their voice. Calm, friendly and sympathetic to the dilemma at hand saves the company time fixing an issue that could have been handled by the right and or well trained hero.

Now where is my cape? Anyone seen my cape? How about my boots? They’re red…Anyone?

How about my tights?

Check out these great posts on Social Media!

“The Rules of Social Media Engagement” by Brian Solis

“Don’t SPAM Me Bro!” by Ted Coine

“Let It Be- The Beatles take on Customer Service in Social Media” by Ty Sullivan